Your words are a reflection of what you believe about yourself.
Do you genuinely believe that you are a success or at least one in the making? If you do, then your words should testify to that fact, and there is no doubt that people who listen to you should affirm the same. If you are in this category, your words always are full of hope and faith and will portray your confidence. However, if you view yourself as someone who struggles and feels like a victim, then your words will be of self-doubt, lack of faith, and pessimism.
“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it.”― J. M. Barrie, (Peter Pan)
You will show people what you believe about yourself.
Yes, your words can tell others a lot about you. By merely listening to you, other people can gauge what level of confidence you will have about yourself. They will also be able to understand very quickly what you think about you.
If you introduce yourself quietly without saying your full name, you will be telling others you are shy, timid, and possibly embarrassed.
If you introduce yourself in a clear voice and tone, stating your full name, you will be telling others that you are confident and bold, ready to engage with them.
Do you see the two differences? One is strong and engaging; the other is weak and non-engaging.
You teach people how to treat you based on what you believe about yourself.
Pay attention to the phrases you use regularly. What do you say, all the time? Are you saying things like, “No, I can’t” or “That’s impossible for me to do”? Or do you put yourself down when you have made a mistake? “I’m stupid” or “What an idiot I am.” These words and phrases are self-esteem killers.
Not only are you doing yourself great harm to your mindset, but you are also showing others how to treat you. We teach others how to treat us, and if we are showing up as a victim or as a weak individual, do not be surprised when others treat you that way.
On the other hand, when you make statements such as, “No problem, I got this” or “I’ll do my best to get this done,” you tell others that you are up for the challenge and are confident in your abilities.
You will find people will be treating you as a confident person, someone they can rely on to get the job done, or as their go-to person. You will be teaching them to treat you with respect and as a responsible adult.
Of course, there will be times when we must deal with life and what life throws at us. If you are a person who believes in your ability to bounce back from whatever situation you are dealing with, you may find yourself saying phrases such as “This is just a minor setback,” or I will resolve this,” or “I will find a way.”
Those words are a clear indication that you do not believe you are a victim of life, but instead, you will be victorious in overcoming the challenge. You have chosen to find a positive winning solution to all situations in life. It does not mean you will never have struggles, but it is how to deal with them that will set you apart and move you towards a successful future.
You can change to more positive self-belief…the decision is yours.
You may be thinking, wait a minute, I did not choose this situation I am in, or whatever may be happening in your life, and maybe you didn’t. But you do get to chose if you stay in it.
Today you get to decide how you want the rest of your life to turn out. You get to determine if you are going to be a victim or a person of strength. You get to decide what you will believe about you.
You can start with your words. Stop yourself when you are about to go off on a negative tangent about something. It might be hard at first, as your negative mindset may want to take hold. If that happens, that is okay. Forgive yourself for allowing negativity to flow out of your mouth and promise yourself you will do better next time.
Your belief in yourself creates energy.
The truth is we fuel our image with our words. Words create energy in our bodies. Test it if you are unsure. Say something negative to yourself and ask yourself how you feel. Then say something positive to yourself and notice the difference.
If you say positive things enough times and pay attention to how you feel when you say those words, you will be changing how you view yourself. And when you change how you view you, how others view you will change as well.
The gardener
A story told of a gardener who took on an experiment to discover the power of words on plants. He took two similar flowerpots, and each day spoke positive comments to one but cursed the other.
Despite their getting the same physical care, water, sunlight, and air, the gardener noticed that one was flourishing, and the other was drying up and dying after a couple of weeks. It was not hard to guess which one thrived.
If words can affect plants, then imagine what words can do to our soul.
Being kinder to yourself, thinking good thoughts will help you to believe more in yourself.
The good news is that you can counteract the negativity you have been saying to and about yourself.
Did you know that there was a study conducted by the National Science Foundation? What they found was that we, on average, think 12,000 – 60,000 thoughts per day. And they found that 80% (yes, that is right, 80%) of our thoughts are negative. And even worse, 95% of our thoughts are repetitive.
It seems we are doomed. But not so. Awareness is the key to change. You are now aware, and now you can move forward with changing your thoughts to positive and being kinder to yourself. It is up to you. No one can do it for you. I shared some tips in another blog post titled the Power of Self Belief, be sure to check that out too.
Want to develop more confidence and self-belief? Here are a few tips that will help.
Use affirmations – write affirmations on sticky notes and place them around your home, workplace, and vehicle. Wherever you spend lots of time, so you can see them all day.
Write – grab a piece of paper, journal, or on a computer and put a line down the center of the paper. On one side, write out all the negative you can think of, and then for each negative, write out a positive to counteract it.
Get an app – I use HiFutureSelf. It allows me to pre-type positive messages to myself, and then I can schedule them to be sent to me by text message. It has helped me on many occasions. When I was feeling insecure about what I was doing, then “ding” goes my phone, and there is a positive message written by me, to me.
Is it time to live your best life and believe in you?
We only get one chance at this life, just one. You are important, and you matter. You may be in a negative living environment, and if so, then it is even more critical that you believe in yourself.
It can be challenging living in this world. But it can also be amazing and rewarding. Never in my wildest dreams did I see myself sitting here and writing this for you, to help you. But I am.
Tomorrow is another day. If you do not get it right today, then you can get it right tomorrow. The key is to not give up on yourself. If you give up on you, well, most likely, so will others. So, keep trying. Keep at it.
Believe in yourself. Believe you can do it. Believe in your courage and your abilities. When you believe in yourself, you will get to live your best life. And that is my wish for you.
If you want even more self esteem tips, I think you’ll like my ebook 100 Tips to Boost Your Confidence and Build Your Self Esteem. Get instant access to download your free copy of the ebook here.
